January 31, 2020

Flame

A grim alignment like some rare cosmic event: the United Kingdom’s departure from the European Union occurred on the same day the last glimmer of faith in America’s institutions faded. Today the Senate decided it did not want to hear any evidence against the president even though witnesses are publishing books and hollering about it in the streets. We know he is guilty, they said, but nothing matters. Meanwhile I scroll through footage of Chinese drones yelling at citizens who aren’t wearing face masks. I cannot tell if these videos are real or fake. Long-simmering anxiety has a new focal point, a new excuse for indulging in much darker fears. Borders are being closed. Travel restrictions are going into effect.

A woman once told me that she was going to win the game of hide-and-seek that she’s been playing with god. I still wonder if she is hiding or seeking. I want to learn to watch a fireplace the way I watch television or stare at my telephone. Everything else is unnecessary elaboration.


Vatican Shadow – Once This Fire Gathers Strength

From Atta’s Apartment Slated for Demolition | Hospital Productions, 2012 | Bandcamp

Music for the paranoid style in American politics.

Each night in 2020 I'm writing a short post for a series called Notes From the End of a World because I want to etch these days into my memory before I forget them. Before the world changes completely.
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